The Search For Love
Posted: Monday, November 15, 2010
by George Stay
Somewhere, out there, in the world is the person for you. Somewhere amid 6,768,181,146 people(July 2010 est.)is someone who was created just for you. And you for them.
So go out and find them.
Or just log on to the Internet.
There are hundreds of sites on the Internet offering to help people find the "love of their life" or their soulmate. The need is so great, and the competition too, that some of the bigger ones such as Match.com and eHarmony spend thousands of dollars a day on cable television advertising in order to "help you find the love of your life."
We are a world of people desperately seeking love. If you doubt that, just consider the pitches these sites make:
This is from Adult Friend Finder: "If you are looking for something more intimate than just a date then you should check out Adult Friend Finder. Here you will find thousands of like minded adults with sexy photos, seeking affairs, discrete relationships and sexual encounters. Best of all it's free to register so what are you waiting for?"
Or consider Perfect Match: "If you are seeking your perfect match then look no further! Featuring millions of registered members, Perfect Match is packed with fantastic features which makes it stand out from all the other dating sites.
“I was painfully shy. I was also nerdy, dweebie, geeky, gawky, needy, and the rest of the Seven Dorks. And that person still resides inside me. He's still there and arises, unbidden, whenever I meet a beautiful woman.”
These pitches range from the sexy -- "GetInOn.com gives you the opportunity to chat and meet with sexy individuals who have the same sexual preferences as you. Whether you are looking for a single-night sexual encounter or a lasting affair, you will find thousands of steamy options through Get It On! From looking through photos and videos to live webcam chats, I was able find a partner who I can hook up with and share my intimate fantasies" -- to the more sublime -- "On christianmingle, In just minutes, you can find others in your area who share your values and love for God. If you have considered trying Christian Dating online, then Christian Mingle is the site for you. Christian Mingle is an online community created specifically for Christian singles looking to find friends, romance, or marriage."
And some are just, well, blunt: "For all those ladies seeking a bonified sugar daddy, wealthy men.com is the one and only online personals site for men and women who are seeking a higher standard of online dating. Women can look for successful men who make over $100K a year, and men will receive many more e-mails on this dating site than any other. Visit now, to browse profiles without even signing up!" Or consider this one: "The Ashley Madison Agency is targeted toward people who are bored in their current relationship. They want people to know that when monogamy becomes monotony, there are other options out there. It is the largest dating site in the world and 100% secure and confidential for those looking to hide their extracurricular activities. Take a look- it is absolutely free to view member profiles and exchange photos."
Wow!
Yes, people do and have met through the Internet and such search sites. I know of two happily married couples who found each other this way. Would they have found each other anyway, without the help of the World Wide Web? Possibly. But when he is living in upstate New York and she's living in Dallas, that possibility is highly remote. So maybe this online dating service thing does work.
At the same time, though, there is no magic formula to finding that one special person, regardless of what the search sites claim. And because each of us is unique, no one avenue or method is going to lead us to them. Nor can anyone or any site guarantee you will meet "the love of your life." Count on that. You pay your money, and you take your chances. With your heart.
And, maybe, sometimes the problem is you. You have to be mentally, emotionally and even physically ready for love to bloom. You can try too hard, which simply does not work. You have to be relaxed and yourself, two things people often find difficult to be.
Take me, for instance. As a young man, I searched for her -- that one woman I was born to be with -- as hard as Diogenes searched for an honest man. I knew she was out there somewhere. I believed it with every fiber of my being. But I was painfully shy. I was also nerdy, dweebie, geeky, gawky, needy, and the rest of the Seven Dorks. And that person still resides inside me. He's still there and arises, unbidden, whenever I meet a beautiful woman.
And yet, through what can only be called the grace of God, I did meet her. We began as friends and, through a foundation of trust and sharing, fell in love. And we managed all of that without a bar, without the Internet, without matchmakers, without friends trying to hook us up. We found each other through a shared interest, through our faith, through God. So it can happen. When it does, it hits you like a 2-by-4 to the forehead. Your world is completely changed and what happened or came before her suddenly is so irrelevant. A light has come on in your world and your life and you know you want only one thing: To spend every possible second of the rest of your life with her, no matter what it takes or what that costs.
So keep scouring the earth -- by foot, by phone, in bars all alone, through the Web, through singles ads, via plane, car or bus, or on a wing and a prayer -- because he or she is out there, somewhere.
You just have to keep looking. And taking your chances.
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Top-level comments on this article: (3 total)I'm amazed at the site for women looking for wealthy men. Surely nobody's looking for love there!Jennifer, that, indeed, is a sad statement on life, that people will be that bald-faced and open about their undying greed and placing that above love. It pains an unrepentant romantic like me to see such things since I truly believe love is the answer to all of our woes, all of our troubles. I believe that is why this Internet soulmate search is so popular. But maybe I'm just a naive man.
This is a fabulous article- stating the absolute truth- I'm so glad that I don't have to drag through all those sites and queries......it is quite possible to find the other half of your soul, and online too-when it happens, you don't have to wonder- you KNOW--- But finding them is one thing, securing this merger is quite another........both sides must work toward it equally.- Thanks George- Always- Ella
I'm all for love! I am coaxing a girlfriend to give on-line dating a try but she's hesitant. Maybe I would be too if it were me. But I agree George, there is someone for everyone and they're worth looking for. Interesting article. Thank you.
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